(Based on the song "Ghost Of You and Me" by BBMak)
"Chris, stop!" Erica yelled as she ran up to him and tackled his hand. "You're not taking those!"
"What? Leave me alone! I just want to sleep!" he replied with an attitude as he threw the bottle of sleeping pills at her.
"Well, you don't have to take all of them!" she exclaimed as she followed him into his room.
"Who said I was taking all of them?" he mumbled as he buried his face into his pillow.
"Do you consider 10 pills in your hand not enough?" she pointed out to the hall floor where the pills were scattered among the carpet.
"Would you just leave me alone?"
"No! You have been acting weird since we've been in L.A. I want to know whats up!" she demanded as she sat down beside him.
"Nothing. I just don't wanna talk about it, alright?"
"Chris, c'mon. I'm not leaving until you tell me whats going on"
"Fine" he grumbled and turned over. "What do you want to know?"
"Everything, I mean like the weird moods and why you were trying to take like 20 of these things!" she replied as she looked down at the bottle filled with Nytol tablets.
"It was 10 not 20" he tried to joke with her.
"Thats not funny. I'm trying to be serious here"
"Yeah, yeah, I know"
"So, whats wrong, Chris?" she tried to be sympathetic.
"It's just something that I should have gotten over a long time ago. Its just stupid and not important" he plopped his head back down on the pillow.
"Everything is important, no matter how stupid you think it is"
"I guess" he exaggerated.
"It's Lexie, isnt it?" she simplified the conversation.
"Yeah" he softly replied as he stared at the pills still laying out in the hall.
"You still miss her and maybe still not over her?" Erica asked as though she were a psychiatrist.
"I miss her alot, more than you could ever know. And I don't know if I am over her. Haven't been with anyone else to figure out. Yet, I'm afraid to be with anyone else because of her" he leaned up on his elbows and looked back at Erica with tired eyes.
"We all miss her, too. But, you have to let her go and move on. And look at you, you are practically falling asleep. You didn't need these" she looked down at the bottle again.
"You know I didn't need them to fall asleep" he rubbed his eyes. "Please don't tell anyone about this"
"I don't know know if I can do that, Chris. You guys are about to go on a major tour and your mental state is going down the drain. You can't keep feeling sorry for yourself when you have a job like this. You have to keep moving because if you start slacking, the guys are going to notice and you are just gonna feel worse. I can't let you do that to them or yourself"
"Well, they don't need the drama of what you just saw right now either. They are just gonna be watchin me and worrying all the time"
"Fine. I won't say anything, but you need to get over all this and get back to your old self. And, don't try anything like this again!" she exclaimed and stood up.
"Yes mommy" he joked again.
"Well, at least your working on it" she replied and walked out into the hall to pick up the other pills. Chris turned off his light and fell asleep quickly.
"Where were you?" Lance asked as she came down the stairs.
"Nowhere. I just ran into Chris in the hall and I was talkin to him for a bit before he went to bed" she replied and quickly threw the pills into the garbage before Lance noticed.
"Um, ok?" Lance replied with a question in his voice. "Talk about anything interesting?"
"Nothing out of the ordinary" she yawned. "Ready for bed?"
"In a minute. You can go, I'll be up in a few"
"Ok" she replied and walked out of the kitchen.
Lance walked around the corner of the door and watched her walk up the stairs and into their room. He turned around quickly and dug into the garbage and found the bottle of Nytol.
"Now why did she throw these away?" he said to himself as he walked over to the one cabinet, opened the door, and placed the bottle inside.
"Lets do that again, please!" their one choreographer, Tony, yelled at the guys as they regrouped in the dance studio. "Chris, you're slacking, lets pick it up a bit!"
"Yes sir!" Chris exaggeratingly saluted him as he took his place as Pop started.
"So, how's it going?" the head choreographer, Wade, asked over the loud music.
"They are ready. Chris is following a bit behind, but he knows the job and he'll be ready soon too"
"Let's hope so. This is going to be their biggest tour. He has to be in tip top shape or he wont last long"
"Maybe we should give him a good talk?"
"Yeah, make sure his head is on straight"
"Okay! Let's take a 15!" Tony yelled as he turned off the music.
"Chris, I need to talk to you" Wade walked over to Chris and led him out the room.
"What was that all about?" Justin asked Tony.
"Nothing important. I'll be back in 15"
"Ok?" Justin sat down by the wall. "I hope everything is kewl"
"Me too" Erica replied, not noticing that she made her concern slip outloud.
"Do you know something we don't?" Lance asked.
"No, not really. Just hope nothing's wrong"
"Woohoo, the girls are here!" Joey exclaimed as their dancers, Chantal, Diana, Kristin, Michele, and Annalisia walked in the door, followed by the other two choreographers, Dan and Darrin.
"Ok, we are going to do a run through of Pop and then everyone is going to do the dance together" Dan explained as the girls took their positions.
"So, is everything ok?" JC asked as Chris returned 10 minutes later.
"Yeah, everything is kewl" he replied as he looked down at Erica.
"Ok, everyone lets go!" Tony yelled as the guys and the girls took their positions for yet another session through Pop. They started their 8 hour lesson for what would be another long day.
"Ok, we are going to start the Gone sequence with Justin and his girlfriend in the park in 5 minutes! And, Justin, don't forget the flower this time!" Kenny, the director for the film sequences that were shown during the concerts, yelled to Justin who was getting his last minute makeup done.
"Man, I am so tired, I won't just forget about the flower, I am gonna forget to stay awake" he complained as they finished the dark makeup around his eyes.
"It's not like any of us aren't tired" Chris replied.
"Well, I'm the one doing all the acting" Justin snapped back.
"Only because you were the one picked to cry so all the girls would scream at the concerts"
"Geez man, calm down" Justin replied with an attitude, dropping his top hat to the floor.
"Sorry man, I'm just getting really grumpy"
"It's kewl. Maybe after this you should get some rest. Go to bed early so that you will be okay tomorrow"
"Sounds like a good idea actually" Chris replied, stood up, and walked to the set of the sidewalk and steps that the rest of the guys sat on when Justin walks back from the park.
"Everyone on the set!" Wade yelled as he showed up to help with the shots.
Two hours later they were finally finished. It took them a half an hour to remove their makeup and clothes and an hour later they finally regrouped to leave.
"Hey guys, I'm out! I'm really drained, I'll catch ya at home" Chris yelled as he left quickly.
"Thats weird" Joey said, looking out the door where Chris ran out from. "He usually doesn't leave without us"
"He'll be fine. I told him to go home and get some rest" Justin replied.
"I hope so" Erica said under her breath as she watched Chris jump into an SUV and take off down the dimly lit street.
"Man, I'm headin straight to bed" Justin yawned as they all walked in the door at 11:30.
"Make sure Chris is here" Erica said as she followed JC and October into the kitchen.
"Well, I'm sure he is. Where else would he be?" Justin replied but walked upstairs to check on him anyway.
"I can't believe we have to get up tomorrow morning at 8 and have to work til this time tomorrow night" JC said groggily as he rested his head in his hands.
"And the next day after that and the one after...." Joey started.
"Okay we get it" Lance interrupted him.
"He's up there sleeping like he said he would be" Justin said as he joined them in the kitchen. "I found this bottle at the bottom of the bed, though. I thought he was tired enough without taking these"
Erica jumped up and grabbed the empty bottle quickly. "How did he get this? I threw it away!"
"Why did you throw it away? What's going on?" Joey questioned quickly.
"I took it out of the garbage and put it in this cabinet because I was wondering the same thing" Lance said as he opened the cabinet door. The spot where the bottle was, was empty.
"Shit!" Erica cursed and ran up the stairs. Everyone quickly followed.
"What is going on?" Justin repeated as Erica jumped on his bed to try to wake him.
"Oh my God! He has no pulse!" Erica screamed as she frantically tried to wake him.
"You've gotta be kidden me!" Justin started to worry as Erica panicked.
"We need to call an ambulance now!" Erica yelled again as October rushed to the phone.
"Holy shit!" Justin exclaimed as he checked Chris' pulse. "This isnt real! What the hell happened?"
"Oh God!" Erica continued to panic. "I told him not to do this!"
"What are you talking about?" JC jumped in as everyone started pacing around the room as tears formed in their eyes.
"The ambulance will be here in 5 minutes" October yelled as she hung up.
"I don't know if we have 5 minutes" Erica cried as she began CPR.
Lance kneeled down and picked up the empty bottle that Erica dropped on the floor and looked at the rest of them. They looked back at him with the same thought in mind. It had become clear what he had done.
Five hours had passed since Chris was admitted to the hospital. By only a miracle, Chris survived his overdose attempt. The doctors had told Erica that her CPR had given him a bigger chance of survival since he had only taken the pills about a minute before they got home.
"I am so glad he's gonna make it" Erica sighed as she sat down in the private waiting room. Two bodyguards stood outside the door and they all hoped that nothing leaked to the media.
"So, will you explain to us what happened since you are the only one who knows?" Justin asked as they all sat around a round table.
"Ok" she sighed again. "The other night I caught Chris trying to take all those pills. I stopped him and we talked for awhile. He explained why he was acting weird lately and why he was trying to take them"
"So, why was he acting all weird?" Joey asked.
"He still misses Lexie. He can't let her go like we all have. He has been keeping it inside but secretly he has been falling apart. I told him to get his head on straight and not to do something stupid. I thought I threw them away but I guess I was wrong" she finished and looked at Lance.
"I'm sorry. I didn't know why you threw them away. I didn't know" he replied and looked down at the floor.
"Is Chris okay?" Johnny barged into the room quickly.
"Yeah, he'll be fine" Justin replied.
"I can't believe he did this. Now I don't know what is going to happen with the tour"
"Well, we can't just shove him out on a stage right now, he won't be able to handle that" JC replied.
"Yeah, I know what you mean. We are going to have to cancel up to the Florida concert at least" Johnny brushed his hair with his hand.
"But, no more than that. We can't have people worrying" Lance added.
"We'll just say that we are still preparing last minute details"
"Whatever you have to do" Joey replied.
"I have to get on that. Let me know if there is any other news" Johnny finished and went back out the door.
"Miss Taylor?" a nurse barged into the room
"Im here!" Erica jumped up.
"Chris is awake. He would like to talk to you"
"Ok!" she exclaimed and followed the nurse. The rest of them followed behind.
"Hey" Chris said hoarsly, his throat dry from all the stress that was put to it.
"You really scared me" Erica replied as she sat on the chair beside him.
"I'm sorry"
"Why did you do it? You told me you wouldn't"
He took a deep breath, his lungs still striving for air. "I don't know. It's just been all the stress with the tour...." he paused. "And Lexie"
"You shouldnt have done this. You could have talked to me. God, we were so worried about you"
"I know, I know" he closed his eyes as a tear escaped and rolled down his cheek. "I'm sorry" he whispered.
The sadness in his voice made her eyes start watering as she leaned to him. "They are canceling some of the first tour dates until you get back up on your feet"
"Why did they do that? They shouldnt have" Chris opened his eyes again and stared at the ceiling.
"Well, they can't perform without you and they didnt want you performing until you were okay. They don't want to go through this again"
"I don't know how I can ever make this up to them. They will never look at me the same. They probably think I'm a loon"
Erica laughed. She was happy that he could still joke with her. "You don't have to make anything up to them. I explained everything. They understand"
"Even I don't understand. I was stupid. Why did I do this?" he questioned himself as he sighed.
"You need to let her go" Erica grabbed his hand and he looked at her.
"I have to. Look what I've done. This isn't me"
"Well, then once you get out of here, I'm expecting the old Chris back. The one that makes jokes and pulls pranks on people when they are sleeping"
"Yeah, I have so many other things to look forward to" Chris laughed.
"Thats the spirit!" she smiled and stood up.
"Thank you for understanding and being here. Even though I didn't do what you told me to the first time, I did hear you. I won't make the same mistake again"
"Thats good. Now you get some rest. You have a busy schedule when you get back" she started to walk towards the door.
"Ok. I'll catch ya in the wash"
"I'm not even gonna ask!" Erica laughed. Chris laughed with her and watched her walk out the door. He quickly fell asleep.